Exploring the Oedipal Shadows in Apple TV’s Drama ‘Disclaimer’: A Psychotherapeutic Perspective

Ive had a period of time off work and have been binge watching a lot of TV, hence another review from a therapy perspective.

Apple TV’s drama Disclaimer, directed by Alfonso Cuarón and starring Cate Blanchett and Kevin Kline, dives into a labyrinthine psychological landscape that plays upon memory, guilt, and the stories we tell ourselves to survive. Set against the backdrop of a suspenseful, noir-inspired world, the story follows Catherine Ravenscroft (played by Blanchett), a successful investigative journalist who faces disturbing revelations when a book eerily similar to her own life and past traumas unexpectedly appears. This series unfolds like a psychoanalytic session, forcing Catherine—and the viewer—to confront the buried emotional forces that shape our lives and haunt our dreams.

Beneath the surface of Disclaimer’s thriller elements lies a powerful undercurrent of Oedipal tension, a theme rooted in Sigmund Freud’s early insights into the deep, often unconscious, familial ties that define our psyches. In particular, Disclaimer taps into the painful but universal experience of the Oedipus complex: the lingering, unresolved attachments to our parents that influence, haunt, and perhaps even entrap us throughout our lives. As we follow Catherine’s journey, the series provides a potent exploration of what it means to wrestle with the forces of family, fate, and self-concept—an internal battle that resonates with any viewer familiar with the emotional dynamics of psychotherapy.

The Oedipal Themes of Disclaimer: A Repressed Story

Freud’s Oedipus complex speaks to a primal, usually unconscious desire in children to possess the parent of the opposite sex and view the same-sex parent as a rival. While the classic Freudian model often emphasizes young children’s early-life attachments, Disclaimer takes a more nuanced, adult approach to this concept, where the “Oedipal” struggle is not with parental figures directly but with figures who echo parental roles and wield haunting psychological influence.

Catherine, though a respected figure in her professional life, becomes childlike and vulnerable as she reads the mysterious book—experiencing it as a powerful mirroring of her past. Kevin Kline’s character embodies the role of a “ghostly parent” in the narrative, an enigmatic figure from Catherine’s past who seems to hold a disturbing power over her present. Their dynamic illustrates an adult version of the Oedipal confrontation: Catherine’s challenge is not simply to escape from this shadowy figure’s influence but to contend with how deeply she has internalized aspects of him in her own psyche.

In therapy, this process is often described as working through “introjections,” the unconscious psychological absorption of figures who influenced us. As Catherine reads the disturbing story and feels exposed by it, the series subtly explores how we might carry internal versions of our early attachments (parental or otherwise) that can shape us without our awareness. These internalized figures, like ghosts of our early lives, continue to govern our self-concepts, behaviors, and emotions, long after the actual relationships are gone.

Trauma, Guilt, and the Unconscious Mind

Disclaimer presents Catherine’s repressed past not merely as a series of “events” to recall but as emotional material that has structured her identity and her way of perceiving the world. She is an emblematic character for any of us who have had to compartmentalize painful memories to get on with life. Her work as a journalist, investigating secrets and mysteries in the outside world, can be seen as an outward displacement of her own unresolved internal secrets. This resonates deeply with psychotherapy, where what we choose to see—and, crucially, what we choose to avoid—often becomes a central theme.

As in Freud’s model of the unconscious, Catherine’s defenses are mobilized against painful memories and feelings that she has long denied. The arrival of the book challenges these defenses, forcing her into a confrontation with parts of herself she has repressed. In a sense, she is both the child longing for closeness and the “prohibited” figure bearing unresolved guilt, mirroring the guilt and anxiety often associated with Oedipal conflicts.

The series, like many therapeutic journeys, suggests that healing requires bringing these shadowy, split-off parts of ourselves into the light. For Catherine, it is not only about “solving the mystery” but about encountering her own vulnerability and reclaiming parts of her story that she has avoided, perhaps for years. Disclaimer poignantly portrays this as a painful but ultimately transformative process, not unlike the process of therapy, where we learn to integrate these repressed memories and emotions into a coherent sense of self.

The Stories We Tell Ourselves: Memory as Narrative

Memory is not simply factual in Disclaimer; it is fluid, interpretive, and, at times, unreliable. Catherine’s attempts to reconcile her recollection of events with what is presented in the mysterious book reflect the psychotherapeutic notion that memory is often shaped as much by what we want to believe as by what actually happened. The act of storytelling becomes both a tool of self-preservation and self-betrayal—an attempt to create a coherent narrative that, in protecting us, also traps us.

In Disclaimer, Catherine’s journey shows us that our stories can liberate us when they reflect an honest grappling with the full range of our emotions and experiences. However, when used defensively, these narratives risk hiding deeper truths, protecting us from pain but also perpetuating it. Her discomfort with the book reflects this painful duality. The mystery uncovers that the boundaries we create between ourselves and others, between truth and memory, are as vulnerable as any defense.

In therapy, we learn that part of growth and healing involves rewriting our life stories with awareness and honesty, even when it means facing uncomfortable truths. Like Catherine, we are all called to move beyond the stories we initially crafted to survive and risk creating new ones that accommodate the complexities of our inner worlds.

Conclusion: Disclaimer as a Mirror of Self

In Disclaimer, Catherine’s journey is as much about solving an external mystery as it is about facing her own psyche. The show becomes a mirror, holding up questions that any of us might encounter on a therapeutic journey: What shadows of our early attachments haunt us? What parts of our stories remain hidden, and at what cost? And are we willing to confront the full, messy reality of who we are, rather than the curated versions we present to the world?

Much like psychotherapy, Disclaimer offers no easy resolutions. Instead, it invites viewers to reflect on their own unconscious material—the hidden influences and the unresolved emotional conflicts that shape our lives from the shadows. The series, in its subtle unfolding, underscores a profound truth of the therapeutic process: growth often begins with discomfort, and healing often begins with a willingness to embrace the parts of ourselves we least want to acknowledge.

Disclaimer is ultimately a study in how, to free ourselves from the prison of the past, we must face not only what happened to us but how we internalized it, how we chose to remember it, and how we might begin to tell ourselves a different, truer story. It is an invitation to enter our own “unwritten books,” guided not by the need to evade our shadows, but by the courage to integrate them.

A permanent state of transition

Donald Winnicott, a prominent psychoanalyst, introduced the concept of transitional objects as a crucial aspect of early childhood development. These objects, often a teddy bear or a comforting blanket, serve as a bridge between a child’s self and the external world, providing a sense of security during the transitional phase of gaining independence. The transitional object acts as a tangible representation of the caregiver, aiding in the child’s exploration of autonomy.

In the realm of technology, our devices have become modern transitional objects. Smartphones, laptops, and other gadgets seamlessly blend virtual and real worlds, acting as bridges between our personal spaces and the vast digital landscape. Similar to a child’s teddy bear, these devices offer a sense of comfort and connection, becoming integral in our daily lives.

However, the parallel doesn’t end there. Winnicott emphasized the importance of the transitional object being an item of the child’s choosing. In the digital age, our relationship with technology mirrors this autonomy. We select and personalize our devices, apps, and online spaces, creating a digital environment that reflects our individuality.

Just as transitional objects assist in navigating the challenges of childhood, technology aids us in navigating the complexities of the modern world. It serves as a tool for communication, learning, and entertainment, becoming an extension of ourselves in the process. Yet, like any transitional object, the use of technology requires a healthy balance to prevent dependency and promote genuine human connections.

In essence, Winnicott’s concept of transitional objects sheds light on the psychological underpinnings of our relationship with technology. Acknowledging the parallels allows us to appreciate the significance of these digital tools in our lives while being mindful of maintaining a balanced and healthy integration of technology into our sense of self and society.

Winnicott and the ‘False Self’

Donald Winnicott’s concept of the false self, a pivotal aspect of his psychoanalytic theory, delves into the adaptive persona individuals create to navigate the world. According to Winnicott, the false self emerges as a defense mechanism, often developed early in life to shield the authentic self from external pressures and potential threats. It represents a socially acceptable façade that conceals one’s true thoughts, emotions, and vulnerabilities.

In the realm of interpersonal relationships, the false self becomes a nuanced lens through which individuals engage with others. It serves as a shield, masking genuine sentiments and presenting a version of oneself deemed more acceptable or palatable to societal expectations. This adaptation can be a survival strategy, a way to fit into social structures and avoid rejection or criticism.

The advent of social media has added a new layer to Winnicott’s concept, exacerbating the development of false selves on a global scale. Online platforms often encourage the creation of curated, idealized identities, fostering an environment where individuals present an exaggerated version of themselves. This curated self, perpetuated through carefully selected posts and images, contributes to the construction of an unrealistic and often unattainable ideal self.

The harmful consequences of this phenomenon are manifold. Individuals may feel compelled to constantly measure up to the standards set by their online personas, fostering a sense of inadequacy and perpetuating the cycle of the false self. The pressure to maintain this idealized image can lead to anxiety, depression, and a diminished sense of self-worth as the disparity between the real and projected self widens.

In summary, Winnicott’s concept of the false self, when examined in the context of contemporary social media dynamics, unveils the intricate interplay between authentic identity and the societal masks we construct. Recognizing the potential harm in perpetuating an ideal self through online platforms underscores the importance of fostering genuine connections and embracing the imperfections that make us uniquely human.

The Addicts Shame

Addiction is a disease that not only affects the physical body, but also crushes the soul. Feeding the disease requires a preoccupation with obtaining and consuming substances. This is often accompanied by deceitful and irresponsible behavior, taking a toll on relationships, family commitments and careers. It is easy to blame the individual for bad behavior – lying, cheating and stealing, as well as angry outbursts – rather than putting the focus on the disease that creates those behaviors. The addicted person is generally not proud of those behaviors. Being shunned by family, friends and society only contributes to greater shame and self-blame.

It is difficult to have compassion for people when presumed poor character is confused with the disease characteristics that undermine it. Compounding this is the common belief that people choose to become addicted, based on weakness, lack of will power and poor judgment. Again, looking beyond myth, science informs us that there is a genetic predisposition for addiction, as well as a range of environmental factors, especially those that occur in early childhood.

Feelings of shame that are become normal to the addict have shown to have a detrimental effect to chances of recovery. Research has consistently demonstrated that whilst guilt can have a positive association with self-forgiveness, shame negatively associated the capacity for self-forgiveness.

Overpowering negative emotions can derail efforts at achieving sobriety. A few therapy-informed techniques can help you stay on course. Many of our feelings are simple reactions to specific events that we perceive as pleasant or unpleasant. After the event is over, the related feeling usually fades away. We can easily see that our emotions are fleeting and impermanent.

Shame does not work this way. The hallmark of shame is a constant awareness of our defects. Without realising it, we become continual victims of shame-based thinking. Every day, we focus on our failures. Every day, we re-convince ourselves that we are defective. Our thoughts become riddled with judgment, regret, and images of impending failure.

There are many thoughts that therapy can bring up to help challenge our internal feelings of shame, judgement and abandonment. When working through specific areas of our lives we may be asked to question our negative thoughts and replace them with more accurate reflections of the self.

Is this thought really true?
How do I know it’s true?
What is the evidence for this thought?
What is the evidence against this thought?
Can I think of any times when this thought has not been true?
Is this thought helping me or hurting me?
What could I do if I let go of this thought?
What’s the worst that could happen if I let go of this thought? Can I live with that?

Working with a therapist who is committed to understanding and promoting recovery can create shifts in the way we regard addiction. Understanding that we need to take fault out of an addicts life and replace it with responsibility can mark a positive step in this direction.

Race in the consulting room

My role as a psychotherapist working in Central London brings me face to face with people of many different backgrounds, ages, races, class and political and religious viewpoint. The origins of psychotherapy lie in Europe which was mostly created by middle class white men to treat mainly white women. Much has changed about the world since then and much has changed in the way we see difference and otherness in the consulting room.

At the beginning of treatment and throughout the course of therapy, both the therapist and patient can expect to be silently evaluated by each other. This process leaves us open to our vulnerabilities. Psychotherapy may activate emotional memories that relate to issues such as trust, entitlement, , authority conflicts, and the possibility of being judged. The opportunity for the person in treatment to expose her difficulties and to have these accepted and validated by the therapist, are critical components of the work. A positive therapeutic relationship is predicated on creating a safe enough space to expose our thoughts and desires and the therapist’s ability to handle these, including navigating those occasions when our differences interfere with a sense of emotional safety.

With this in mind I was struck by the relevance of the film ‘Get Out’ by Jordan Peele. The film artfully attempts to allow a white person to see the world through the eyes of a black person for an hour and half.

In the film, Missy, the therapist uses hypnosis to stir up memories of main character losing his mother and the associated pain to enter his mind. She sends him to ‘The Sunken Place’ – this is used as a metaphor for the representation of People of Colour. The “sunken place,” is where people are weighted down by lies they have internalised about their history and racial trauma. This idea refers to W.E.B Du Bois’s theory of “double consciousness” where we see ourselves through the eyes of the dominant culture. Double Consciousness is an internal struggle that affects the Black psyche. Contemplating oneself through the eyes of others, you are forced to live double lives―the life of a person of colour and as a British citizen, both of which are not liberal to you. Hence, the term ‘double consciousness’. You know what racism feels and looks like, but white people do not know what racism is. They have never experienced it after all. They have never felt what it is to be suppressed by people of their own country. They have never felt that pain or misery that many people of colour have been breathing like air since their birth.

As a psychotherapist there is much to be learnt from this experience. Our role asks us to try to understand the difficulties experienced by another human being, quite often with very different backgrounds to our own. The film ‘Get out’ uses imagery and symbolism to demonstrate both the literal meaning of the dialogue as it unfolds, but also the more subtle unconscious aspects of how we relate to each other and the world.

My experience of my difference means that on occasions I can’t quite tell if what I’m seeing has underlying bigotry, or it’s just a normal conversation and I’m being paranoid. I admit sometimes I see race and racism when its not there. That dynamic in itself is unsettling. It is this dynamic the film is able to capture. These aren’t the racists Hollywood is traditionally more comfortable calling out and posturing against. They aren’t Neo-Nazis, or White Nationalists. These are good White People, proud, well off and liberal who are very likely being completely sincere about their Obama votes and desire to connect with a multicultural society. Peele highlights a very specific subset of White racism: Liberals who are insistent of their non-racism because they admire an abstract ideal of Blackness while not actually engaging or regularly encountering any actual Black people.

Peele isn’t showing us that one race is superior to the other. He’s showing us that ideas of racial superiority are learned and passed down in families, workplaces, social groups and through the media.

Mental Health support contact details

Mental health helplines
Whether you’re concerned about yourself or a loved one, these helplines and support groups can offer expert advice.

Anxiety UK
Charity providing support if you have been diagnosed with an anxiety condition.

Phone: 03444 775 774 (Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 10pm; Saturday to Sunday, 10am to 8pm)

Website: www.anxietyuk.org.uk

Bipolar UK
A charity helping people living with manic depression or bipolar disorder.

Website: www.bipolaruk.org.uk

CALM
CALM is the Campaign Against Living Miserably, for men aged 15 to 35.

Phone: 0800 58 58 58 (daily, 5pm to midnight)

Website: www.thecalmzone.net

Men’s Health Forum
24/7 stress support for men by text, chat and email.

Website: www.menshealthforum.org.uk

Mental Health Foundation
Provides information and support for anyone with mental health problems or learning disabilities.

Website: www.mentalhealth.org.uk

Mind
Promotes the views and needs of people with mental health problems.

Phone: 0300 123 3393 (Monday to Friday, 9am to 6pm)

Website: www.mind.org.uk

No Panic
Voluntary charity offering support for sufferers of panic attacks and obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD). Offers a course to help overcome your phobia or OCD.

Phone: 0844 967 4848 (daily, 10am to 10pm). Calls cost 5p per minute plus your phone provider’s Access Charge

Website: www.nopanic.org.uk

OCD Action
Support for people with OCD. Includes information on treatment and online resources.

Phone: 0845 390 6232 (Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 5pm). Calls cost 5p per minute plus your phone provider’s Access Charge

Website: www.ocdaction.org.uk

OCD UK
A charity run by people with OCD, for people with OCD. Includes facts, news and treatments.

Phone: 0333 212 7890 (Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm)

Website: www.ocduk.org

PAPYRUS
Young suicide prevention society.

Phone: HOPELINEUK 0800 068 4141 (Monday to Friday, 10am to 10pm, and 2pm to 10pm on weekends and bank holidays)

Website: www.papyrus-uk.org

Rethink Mental Illness
Support and advice for people living with mental illness.

Phone: 0300 5000 927 (Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 4pm)

Website: www.rethink.org

Samaritans
Confidential support for people experiencing feelings of distress or despair.

Phone: 116 123 (free 24-hour helpline)

Website: www.samaritans.org.uk

SANE
Emotional support, information and guidance for people affected by mental illness, their families and carers.

SANEline: 0300 304 7000 (daily, 4.30pm to 10.30pm)

Textcare: comfort and care via text message, sent when the person needs it most: www.sane.org.uk/textcare

Peer support forum: www.sane.org.uk/supportforum

Website: www.sane.org.uk/support

YoungMinds
Information on child and adolescent mental health. Services for parents and professionals.

Phone: Parents’ helpline 0808 802 5544 (Monday to Friday, 9.30am to 4pm)

Website: www.youngminds.org.uk

Abuse (child, sexual, domestic violence)
NSPCC
Children’s charity dedicated to ending child abuse and child cruelty.

Phone: 0800 1111 for Childline for children (24-hour helpline)

0808 800 5000 for adults concerned about a child (24-hour helpline)

Website: www.nspcc.org.uk

Refuge
Advice on dealing with domestic violence.

Phone: 0808 2000 247 (24-hour helpline)

Website: www.refuge.org.uk

Addiction (drugs, alcohol, gambling)
Alcoholics Anonymous
Phone: 0800 917 7650 (24-hour helpline)

Website: www.alcoholics-anonymous.org.uk

National Gambling Helpline
Phone: 0808 8020 133 (daily, 8am to midnight)

Website: www.begambleaware.org

Narcotics Anonymous
Phone: 0300 999 1212 (daily, 10am to midnight)

Website: www.ukna.org

Alzheimer’s
Alzheimer’s Society
Provides information on dementia, including factsheets and helplines.

Phone: 0333 150 3456 (Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm and 10am to 4pm on weekends)

Website: www.alzheimers.org.uk

Bereavement
Cruse Bereavement Care
Phone: 0808 808 1677 (Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm)

Website: www.cruse.org.uk

Crime victims
Rape Crisis
To find your local services phone: 0808 802 9999(daily, 12pm to 2.30pm and 7pm to 9.30pm)

Website: www.rapecrisis.org.uk

Victim Support
Phone: 0808 168 9111 (24-hour helpline)

Website: www.victimsupport.org

Eating disorders
Beat
Phone: 0808 801 0677 (adults) or 0808 801 0711 (for under-18s)

Website: www.b-eat.co.uk

Learning disabilities
Mencap
Charity working with people with a learning disability, their families and carers.

Phone: 0808 808 1111 (Monday to Friday, 9am to 5pm)

Website: www.mencap.org.uk

Parenting
Family Lives
Advice on all aspects of parenting, including dealing with bullying.

Phone: 0808 800 2222 (Monday to Friday, 9am to 9pm and Saturday to Sunday, 10am to 3pm)

Website: www.familylives.org.uk

Relationships
Relate
The UK’s largest provider of relationship support.

Website: www.relate.org.uk

Conflicts of Choice.

The idea of conflicts over unacceptable aspects of the self is a central part of the psychodynamic point of view. In relation to our internal worlds Freud borrowed the word ‘dynamic’ from the study of physics to convey the idea of two conflicting forces producing a resultant third force which acts in an opposing direction.

Any attempt to understand the basis of human behaviour must consider the issue of our motivation in relation to the conflicts that arise within our inner selves. Dramatists, poets and artists have explored the fields of love and hate, destructiveness and hedonism long before science turned its attention to these issues. There are many types of innate behaviour, from simple in built reflexes promoted by survival and learning to more complicated patterns built up over our childhood. In Western society our needs are generally no longer driven by our struggle for food and water, but a constant motivator is our desire to relate and for love. In our choice driven society this creates enormous conflict within our psyches.

In relation to relationships there is now a dilemma. Choice implies some conflict. When we break up with someone we might be told ‘there are plenty of fish in the sea’. However, these days these fish really are at our finger tips….on Tinder, Grindr and the many other apps and dating websites. Committing to someone with so much choice is now hard, even impossible. The conflict is always present –with one eye wandering, we want perfection and possibly the next ‘like’ may be that perfect match. Choice. We think opportunity is good. We think the more chances we have, the better. But everything becomes watered-down. Never mind actually feeling satisfied; it can now feel difficult to understand what satisfaction actually looks like, sounds like, feels like. We’re one foot out the door, because outside that door is more. We are unable to see who’s right in front of our eyes asking to be loved, because no one is asking to be loved. We long for something that we still want to believe exists. Yet, we are looking for the next thrill, the next jolt of excitement, the next instant gratification.

Is our constant need to distract ourselves to bombard ourselves with stimuli an indication of our inability to face the conflicts inside our own mind? Is that what makes us miserable? Why we feel dissatisfied? We wonder why nothing lasts and everything feels a little hopeless. Because, we have no idea how to see our lives for what they are, instead of what they aren’t. How can we be expected to stick something out, to love someone when we struggle to love ourselves?

In a world filled with tantalising options perhaps the way to true love is to put our phones down for a moment and take time to consider the people that exist in our lives already.

Food issues

At the start of 2020 many of us will turn our attention to exercise and healthy eating to shift those few extra Christmas pounds and re-energise ourselves into the New Year. However, for some there may be a much darker side to the resolution to look and feel better.

The rise of a form of disordered eating called Orthorexia is becoming increasingly mainstream, fuelled by the mania for healthy eating and our growing anxiety around obesity it lies somewhere on the blurred boundary between being health-conscious and a health obsessive. Defined as a “fixation with righteous or correct eating” – what begins as an attempt to improve one’s lifestyle can morph into an unhealthy fixation. It’s unknown how widespread the condition is because it is not currently recognised as a clinical diagnosis , however, it can be just as harmful psychologically as it possesses the same joyless preoccupation with appearance and food.

Eating disorders are a relatively common psychological illness but are not always well diagnosed. They describe illnesses characterised by irregular eating habits and severe distress or concern about body weight or shape. Eating disturbances may include inadequate or excessive food intake, ultimately damaging an individual’s well-being by both physiological damage to health and psychological illness. There are also the more hidden negative social, employment and lifestyle effects associated with eating disorders.

As a defence mechanism they can represent a maladaptive approach to tolerating the unbearable, and perhaps demonstrate a continued conflict of desire. Those with anorexia may refuse food in order to maintain a space to keep desire alive. Those patients who eat junk food or partake in fad diets only to then indulge in violent bodily purges attempt to feel or subvert desire. These feelings are further complicated by the influences of culture and social media.

The NHS recently revealed that the number of teenagers being admitted to hospital with eating disorders has nearly doubled in the last three years. The Royal College of Psychiatrists has laid the blame for this unprecedented rise firmly at the door of social media and particularly pro-anorexia and pro-bulimia websites offering tips on how to avoid food.

As clinicians we may also become aware of the significant percentage of those with eating disorders who also struggle with alcohol and substance use disorders. In 2003, the National Center on Addiction and Substance Abuse issued the seminal report, “Food for Thought: Substance Use and Eating Disorders,” which highlights this relationship. The report established that Individuals with eating disorders were up to 5 times as likely as those without eating disorders to abuse alcohol or illicit drugs, and those who abused alcohol or illicit drugs were up to 11 times as likely as those who did not to have had eating disorders. Specifically, up to 50% of individuals with eating disorders abused alcohol or illicit drugs, compared to 9% of the general population. Other research has offered similar findings. Struggling with an eating disorder ¬ or a substance use disorder -increases one’s chances of developing the other disorder.

There can be many underlying issues which lead to an eating disorder, these may include, difficult relationships in early life, low self-esteem, loss of a loved one or the end of a relationship. Different forms of psychotherapy, such as individual, family, or group, can be helpful in addressing the underlying causes of eating disorders. Therapy can be fundamental to treatment because it the opportunity to address and heal from traumatic life events and learn healthier coping skills and methods.

Confronting a disorder is the first step of recovery. If you are suffering, it is important to admit that you need help. Though this can be the most painful and difficult part of the process, it is essential in order for recovery to begin. By reaching out for help and confiding in others trust about your struggles, you are taking the biggest step towards overcoming your eating disorder. If you have a loved one who is suffering from an eating disorder and are worried about their eating behaviours or attitudes, it is crucial to communicate your concerns in a loving and supportive way. Confronting the person you care about is a necessary step towards getting them the help and treatment they deserve.

If you are concerned about any issue related to an eating disorder then please consult your doctor or seek advice from a reputable website such as:
https://www.b-eat.co.uk/
https://www.nationaleatingdisorders.org/
http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/eatingdisorders/Pages/eating-disorders-advice-parents.aspx ) http://www.nhs.uk/Livewell/teengirls/Pages/treatmentforeatingdisorders.aspx)

If only….

The word envy comes from the Latin invidere: to look upon maliciously. It is to look at another’s good fortune grudgingly, the feeling of horror when we contemplate a colleagues advantages or the need to spitefully denigrate when we fear that others are getting more than their fair share and certainly more than us.

Melanie Klein’s view of envy highlights its destructive assault on anything that is admirable. ‘Envy is the angry feeling that another person possesses and enjoys something desirable – the envious impulse being to take it away or to spoil it’ (Klein, 1957: 181).

In psychological terms envy is a feeling or impulse, which in its destructive and spoiling qualities can be disastrous to the personality. Envy can inhibit development when deeply entrenched in the psyche and exerts a powerful influence on the whole personality.
The more we examine our own envy, the more we understand it, the less likely will be our need to use it against others. In therapy we might find a way to transform our envy into a vehicle that allows us to look deeper into ourselves. When we feel the raw force of envy we know that we are not settled in our minds and bodies and not fully accepting of who we are in both our beautiful and flawed ways.

Melancholia

The term melancholia has served many uses in literature and poetry. It is perhaps particularly useful as a semantic device in English language writing, where few nouns exist to describe a state of mind which is at once calm, fearful, despairing, restless, hollow, and longing for something inexpressible. In Von Trier’s film Melancholia (2011) he attempts to capture this set of emotions. In the film, Melancholia is the name of a rogue planet that crashes into earth, causing its destruction. The story depicts the lives and relationships of a handful of people in the lead-up to this Armageddon. It centres upon the sisters Justine and Claire, who are portrayed as each other’s conceptual opposites. We see Justine sink further and further into the throes depression whilst Claire tries harder and harder to care for her.

The three terms melancholy, melancholia, and depression have overlapped throughout history, and in a broad, general sense the use of the latter has grown increasingly popular as the former two have declined. This does not mean, however, that ‘depression’ has simply replaced melancholy and/or melancholia. That there exist such a vast number of different historical narratives about melancholia, melancholy, and depression is not simply a result of different perspectives among today’s historians. Rather, it is a testament to the vast and shifting meanings that these terms have possessed over time. When it comes to melancholia in particular, the word has been used at least since antiquity to describe illness, but not one uniform disease. Thus, rather than speaking about melancholia as a single concept, the word is best understood as corresponding to a number of different – though often overlapping concepts.

In psychoanalysis, Hanna Seagal describes melancholic depression as a defence mechanism devised by the body to fight the depressive state of the mind. This defence is known as manic-schizoid. Freud went further and was the first person to use melancholic to describe depression.

Freud compares the phenomenon of mourning after the loss and death of a close loved one to the idea of melancholia. Freud explains, they both share a similar outward affect on the subject and are both due to similar environmental influences. The inhibition, “absorbedness” of the ego, and the disinterest in the external world is evident in both, mourning and melancholia equally.

Despite their similarities, Freud states, there are some fundamental differences; mourning is recognized as a healthy and normal process that is necessary for the recovery of the loss and would not be seen as a pathology nor a need for medical intervention. However, melancholia, is an abnormal pathology, and a dangerous illness due to its suicidal tendency. In ‘healthy’ mourning we slowly detach ourselves from our loss whether that be through death or heartache, in melancholia we attach ourselves to it, creating the empty space within our psyches. Crucially with melancholia, it is the impasse that is created in the impossibility of expressing the true extent of the feeling that overwhelms. In melancholia the capacity to link the thoughts with words that provide catharsis has been lost. The purpose and rituals that we adopt to find meaning lose significance and no longer provide a symbolic capacity to hold our mental and physical selves together. We can see the depiction of this in the film ‘Melancholia’ as the lead characters depression stems from her inability to seek comfort and relevance in the ritualistic behaviours that humans engage in. She becomes more and more absorbed by the meaningless and insincerity of life, loosing the capacity to find the words to connect her feelings to those around her, there is an absence of inherent value both in her self and in living. However, as Justine begins to accept the inevitability of utter sorrow and unhappiness, the sense of longing melancholia produces is so great that it is concurrently painful and sweet as it provides the possibility of escape.

While many of us will have never experienced melancholia to the depth that Justine exhibits it, we can understand her emotions in part by drawing on what we may have experienced of sadness and longing. The film demonstrates that emotion doesn’t have to be rational to be true. In fact, it speaks to the idea that emotion is never rational, but, in contrast to the cultural view, it is not necessarily bad for emotion to be irrational. We can find a kind of optimism in the peace that Justine is ultimately able to find in her melancholia. In the words of the philosopher Slavoj Žižek:

‘If you really want to do something good for society, if you want to avoid all totalitarian threats and so on… accepting that at some day everything will finish, that at any point the end may be near. I think that, quite on the contrary of what may appear, this can be a deep experience which pushes you to strengthen ethical activity.” The result is not fatalistic hedonism, but a kind of profound engagement with the meaning and significance of life’.